wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
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