remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Nobody cheats on THIS.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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