white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
