Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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