How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
