Tell her she can't have a vagina
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
i think my mom watched the whole time
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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