I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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