her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
