I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
