Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
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