Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
