the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Randomize