It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
