Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
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