please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
