she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
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