I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize