batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
