okay pat passed out under dana's car
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
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