i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
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