Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize