i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
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I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Well I just put wine in my tea
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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