Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
