let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize