I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
It's blow job season.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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