JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
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