I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
