fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
mondays should just be called national damage control day
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
