i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
We got so high we made milksteak
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
