so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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