I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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