I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
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I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
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Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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