Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
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