Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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