My room smells like vodka and shame
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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