Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
