I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Randomize