Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
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