I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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