It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize