Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Randomize
