i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
My bed smells like the plague
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
