Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
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