we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
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