Have you finally orgasmed yet?
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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