quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
NoShamevember. You game?
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
