I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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