end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize