Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
