why didn't you poke me back
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Randomize
